When my husband and I would go through a rough time either
from decisions we had made, or just because sometimes bad things do happen, he
would say, “It is what it is!” In other
words it was what it was but now, it is what it is. So how can we fix it? Sometimes when we face troubles, we can find
a way to make it better. In some
situations, there is absolutely nothing we can do to change our
circumstances. The death of a child is
something that cannot be fixed. That nice little saying seemed too simple for
what we were facing. What I have come to
realize is that there is a simple truth though in those five little words. We could not change the death of our
daughter. We had to come to a place of
surrender. We could only control how we
reacted to it. Most of the pain I felt
came from looking at all I had done wrong or regretting all that I didn’t
do. I also looked at how I was going to
go into my future without my daughter.
How could life ever be good again?
In his book, GODISNOWHERE, Mickey Stonier writes about the peace of God
and how we look at our lives. He writes,
“Have you ever noticed that sorrow, regret and guilt are birthed from looking
back, that worry and anxiety come from looking ahead, that doubt and despair
result from looking around at the circumstances, but it is faith that looks
up.”
My dear sister-in-loss, are you looking back and feeling
regret and guilt for things you might have done wrong or wish you had done
differently? Surrender them to our God
who loves you and wishes better for you.
Don’t let these feelings get carried into your future. Tomorrow has
enough worries for itself, so surrender your worries and anxiety over to
God. Don’t let those feelings rob you of
the joy He wants for you this day. Our circumstances when we are in grief can
look dark and hopeless. When we doubt a
future and a hope, we need to hold on tight to the promises He has given
us. We might feel like God is nowhere,
but I guarantee you He is walking right beside you. He is with you when it was what it was and He
will walk beside you when it is what it is.
Look to the past to learn those valuable lessons. Look forward for the purpose He has for you
and look up for His peace to carry You.
– Michele
