1Samuel 17:47 “And everyone assembled here will know that the Lord rescues his people, but not with sword and spear. This is the Lord’s battle.”
Watching seventy-five women walk one by one out the door surrounded by the beauty of the Colorado Mountains brought a sense of awe to my soul. I prayed as we walked out the door that every woman would once and for all turn her hurts over to the one who has the strength to carry them. Each woman had in her hand a rock that she had carried throughout the weekend. This rock represented a burden they chose to carry with them every minute of every day. It was the one burden they felt that kept them stuck in the valley of the shadow of death. As we talked about laying our burdens down and how our children would want us to let go of whatever was holding us in bondage, you could feel a struggle going on. It felt like one would have to pry these rocks from the fingers that held onto these rocks for dear life. One woman even asked if she could take her rock home. I wondered to myself, what is it that makes us want to continue to hold on to the very thing that is hurting us. Why do we feel that we deserve to carry our burdens for the rest of our lives? Do we have this need to feel unworthy? Maybe it’s the need to feel guilty for things we left undone or unsaid. Is it because we feel we fell short of the make-believe perfect mom that never existed and never will? Or are we are just so used to carrying those rocks around they have become a part of who we think we are. If only we understood that the Lord has something better for us. This is not how we are to live as Christians. We are not perfect and we will always make mistakes, especially as a mother trying to raise another human life. We have all done things that we are sorry and ashamed off. We live in this constant tension of what we have been and what we want to be. The Lord tells us to cast our cares on Him because He cares for us. He is our protector and rescuer. Yet we continue to carry those rocks.
We all have struggles and hidden hurts that we have built walls around. One by one each woman walked up and as a community they laid their brokenness down at the foot of the cross. We formed our brokenness into a heart, a heart that was longing for mercy and healing. I believe in that moment, hearts were starting to be mended. This mending will take time. Many of these rocks will find their way back into the clutches of these moms. I pray they know that there is mercy waiting for them each time they pick that rock back up.
We can learn a lesson from David and how he faced his giant. David faced his giant and defeated him with the use of a rock and a slingshot. He had no heavy weapons or armor. That gave him the ability to move faster than Goliath because there was nothing weighing him down. He also had the faith to know that the Lord was walking with him and the battle was the Lord’s. He faced his giant with strength and courage. I believe these women faced their Goliath up there in the beautiful mountains. They laid down their giant of guilt, anger, unforgiveness and all the other thousands of giants we as mothers beat ourselves up for. I pray that these moms left that giant that day in the valley of the shadow of death. It takes courage and strength to face our giants but with the Lord by our side we can be victorious.
Lord, sticks and stones may break our bones, but rocks we continue to carry can break our hearts.
