Isaiah 40:31 “But those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.”
In the stillness of the morning, I came into my prayer room in anticipation of meeting with the Living God. There had been a shift in my heart the past week, and I was so incredibly grateful to the Lord for placing a joy in my heart, when all of my circumstances around me seemed so bleak. There is nothing more thrilling in my life than these quiet hours in the morning before my home awakes with the busyness of the day. It was less than a week before Christmas and I had done absolutely no Christmas shopping, our bank account was the lowest it had ever been, my husband was going in that day for another surgery, I was overweight, I was really missing my son, I felt as though I was coming down with the flu and yet deep within the center of my soul was a chamber of peace and delight that had come to be at rest in all that was within me. It seemed as though in the empty corners of my heart, in the loneliness of the season, somewhere along the journey of grief and mourning, I had finally prepared room for the Lord to come and abide deep in the sacred place in the substrata of my being, and I was filled with contentment because He was enough. My reaction to daily irritating difficulties no longer overwhelmed me and even the annoying situations that I used to stew over for days were able to come and go without much consideration because in the big scheme of things, I had come to stop and pause, and in that moment I realized that it really didn’t matter.
Psalm 37:7 says, “Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for Him; do not fret when people succeed in their ways, when they carry out their wicked schemes.” There has always been something deep inside of me that requires things be fair, just and righteous. It bothers me a lot when events occur that I don’t think should be happening in my life. I am sure that is the reason why it has taken me so long to come to fully believe that God’s blessings flow not only in the blossoming spring time and the warm summers of life, but also in the cloudy, dark, harsh cold deadness of winter. It is a daily, moment by moment yielding of my natural flesh to the divine power and might of the Holy Spirit, who continually strengthens the inner me while the outer me diminishes and wastes away. It has been a gradual transition of dwelling in Him and trusting in the sovereign plan of God while placing my hope in the eternal riches of the glory of Heaven, the anticipation of once again being reunited with my son and the person of Jesus Christ instead of focusing my attention on the things I do not have here on earth. When I find myself discouraged by what is going on around me, when doubt creeps in and the angst of the chaos starts to weigh heavy on my heart, I have learned to be still before my Lord and to wait patiently for Him to change my viewpoint so I can clearly see the situation through His eyes and it is only then that I have the capacity to respond in a way that reflects His character and not mine.
In the stillness of the morning, I came into my prayer room in anticipation of meeting with the Living God. There had been a shift in my heart the past week, and I was so incredibly grateful to the Lord for placing a joy in my heart, when all of my circumstances around me seemed so bleak. There is nothing more thrilling in my life than these quiet hours in the morning before my home awakes with the busyness of the day. It was less than a week before Christmas and I had done absolutely no Christmas shopping, our bank account was the lowest it had ever been, my husband was going in that day for another surgery, I was overweight, I was really missing my son, I felt as though I was coming down with the flu and yet deep within the center of my soul was a chamber of peace and delight that had come to be at rest in all that was within me. It seemed as though in the empty corners of my heart, in the loneliness of the season, somewhere along the journey of grief and mourning, I had finally prepared room for the Lord to come and abide deep in the sacred place in the substrata of my being, and I was filled with contentment because He was enough. My reaction to daily irritating difficulties no longer overwhelmed me and even the annoying situations that I used to stew over for days were able to come and go without much consideration because in the big scheme of things, I had come to stop and pause, and in that moment I realized that it really didn’t matter.
Psalm 37:7 says, “Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for Him; do not fret when people succeed in their ways, when they carry out their wicked schemes.” There has always been something deep inside of me that requires things be fair, just and righteous. It bothers me a lot when events occur that I don’t think should be happening in my life. I am sure that is the reason why it has taken me so long to come to fully believe that God’s blessings flow not only in the blossoming spring time and the warm summers of life, but also in the cloudy, dark, harsh cold deadness of winter. It is a daily, moment by moment yielding of my natural flesh to the divine power and might of the Holy Spirit, who continually strengthens the inner me while the outer me diminishes and wastes away. It has been a gradual transition of dwelling in Him and trusting in the sovereign plan of God while placing my hope in the eternal riches of the glory of Heaven, the anticipation of once again being reunited with my son and the person of Jesus Christ instead of focusing my attention on the things I do not have here on earth. When I find myself discouraged by what is going on around me, when doubt creeps in and the angst of the chaos starts to weigh heavy on my heart, I have learned to be still before my Lord and to wait patiently for Him to change my viewpoint so I can clearly see the situation through His eyes and it is only then that I have the capacity to respond in a way that reflects His character and not mine.
2 Corinthians 12:8-9 says, “Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But He said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect in weakness.’" How often have I prayed for the Lord to deliver me from my affliction, from my sorrow, from my broken heart and from the loneliness that has set in as a result of the death of my child? How many times have I begged the Lord to remove the pain, the heartache, the agony and the sleepless nights so that I could finally rest in peace? Too numerous to count. What has happened is that in my longing for Him to come and fill me with whatever it’ll take for me to be free of the insidious bondage of grief, in my continuous seeking of His grace, in my turning toward Him fully and completely, I have become so utterly dependent upon my Savior that He has become everything to me. He is all that matters. And because I was not satisfied until I was consumed by His love, I found in the quietness of being along with Him, my Lord met me and He answered my prayer, He renewed my strength and because of who He is, my hope has been restored. And every time I come to the dwelling place of my Savior, He takes me in and I soar with Him on wings like eagles, I run and I do not grow weary, I walk with Him daily and I do not faint, but in my weakness, I have become perfected in Him.
