Mary was a ponder-er. Gazing at her own child in the manger as the fear of the shepherds became a compulsive praise, she kept all these things in her heart and thought about them often. She must have pondered when Simeon’s words in the temple brought both affirmation and foreboding prophecy, and when the angel uprooted the natal family to find safety in Egypt. Years later, frantic with parental worry, questioning her son about His choices, hearing His straightforward response that He needed to do the work of His Father, again she pondered as she stored all these things in her heart. ... Shamed before condemning onlookers, the woman’s adultery became a means for finding reason to accuse the One who claimed to be the Son of God. The woman though found compassion with Jesus and her self-righteous accusers dismissed themselves. When Jesus spoke to her without condemnation, her words to Him were few. ... It was still another woman who knelt behind him [Jesus] at his feet, weeping. Her tears fell on his feet, and she wiped them off with her hair. Then she kept kissing his feet and putting perfume on them. Scripture doesn’t record any words spoken by this one who exchanged her guilt for forgiveness, but her actions are profound and they revealed her heart. ... Earlier, Jesus gave life to the only son of a widow. Interrupting both a funeral procession and the overwhelming grief of a mother, Jesus told her son to sit up and as he did, he began to speak. But again, Scripture records no words from the lips of one whose tears were dried. ... Neither do you hear the words of Jairus or his wife when their own young daughter is given life at the command of Jesus. Faith replaced their fear, and overwhelming joy and amazement replaced their weeping, but their emotions found no words.
There are many in Scripture who verbally do respond to God’s work in their lives, but there are many too who simply ponder as Mary often did. There are those whose guilt or tragedy finds no words to express their emotions or thinking. And even in God-given provision, their lips are still quiet as they ponder the presence and purpose of God. Jesus met many, as He does us today, with gentleness and compassion, patience and understanding, and an acceptance of their situation although He had still more for them. He met them even in their silence because He knew their hearts. How differently He responded than we sometimes do when we meet the silence of a heart. God also tells us that our hearts will find a song; they will find the words that express not only their need, but also God meeting them within their need. I have heard many moms do that. In the raw, abrasive freshness of the death of their child, their tears spill out the dark, numbing silence of their hearts, and their prayers groan with heaviness, and no words. Jesus meets them as He did those in Scripture, and in time, they find their song and their words.
Personally, I have experienced both guilt and tragedy, just as many of you have. God has met me, over and over and over, just as He has met you. And I have found my song, my words, my once silent words, and they express what was the quietness of my darkness, and the Jesus who met me there. Only very recently, I found the words that succinctly speak of my own heart as I remember my daughter, Tonia, and the Jesus who met us both .....................................
Child of my womb, my heart, my love.
Birthed on earth, tiniest of rosebuds.
Cradled by Jesus, petals unfolding
Blossoming perfection, eternally alive.
As I embrace my tears,
She embraces her joy.
– Bev
(Related Bible reading: Luke 2:16-19; Luke 2:51; John 8:1-11; Luke 7:36-50; Luke 7:11-17; Luke 8:49-56)
