The winds of change have begun to blow and so many times I’m grabbing on to whatever I can because I don’t want to do this; I don’t like change. Familiarity is something I am comfortable with, and when change comes, I want to fight back; I want to resist; I want things to stay the same. The thought of moving forward fills me with dread and anxiety; the unknown path that the Lord is leading me to is different and new and outside of my realm of control. Gradually I am letting go of control; I am allowing my life to change and I am changing too. I am allowing the Holy Spirit to take control of my thoughts and my life; I am following blindly and it’s very awkward and uncomfortable not being led by my own thoughts, my own feelings, my own wants and desires.
James 1:8 says, “A double-minded man is unstable in all of his ways.” There can only be one captain of my ship, one master of my life, one driver of my car, and if I continue to make decisions based on my feelings or go places to hide whenever things are awkward and uncomfortable or make choices based upon what I want, then I am not in total submission and surrender to the One who should be leading me and I become a double-minded person. The warm and delightful breezes of smooth sailing can lull me into the stupor of self-sufficiency. It is so easy for me to rely on myself when my life is going well, when things are going smoothly, but trusting in God day to day, moment by moment, reminds me of when I first got sober. I did not take a drink one day at a time; I did not look into the future because the thought of living my life without something to numb and dull my senses was absolutely overwhelming to me, so I took tiny steps of faith and lived my life one day at a time.
Isaiah 26: 3-4 says “You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast, because they trust in You. Trust in the LORD forever, for the LORD, the LORD Himself, is the Rock eternal.” Today I am living one day at a time, trusting Him with tiny steps of faith into unknown and unchartered territory. He is expanding my boundaries and taking me into places I have never been before. Oswald Chambers once said, “When God, by His Spirit through His Word, gives you a clear vision of His will, you must ‘walk in the light’ of that vision even though your mind and soul may not be thrilled by it. Our tendency is to lie back and bask in the memory of the wonderful experience we had when God revealed His will to us back then, however, if we do not respond to His new truths and continue on with even more devotion as a disciple of Jesus Christ, then you will turn to go back and be a deserter.” The real possibility of peace always rests with you and me. We must first understand what it means to truly have the kind of faith that allows us to live at peace with God and that kind of faith only comes through Jesus Christ who is the Prince of Peace. Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. (James 4:8.)
